bone crushing burden of judging

The proBlem with remaining open is that it leAves me vulnerable, it leaves me exposed; but worse, for me, would be to close over and become hard, deaf, mute, and withdrawn. For me openness is what I need no matter others’ behaviors. some would say i am hard, deaf, and/or withdrawn, but i have never stopped listening, i have not stopped working through what i heard and hear.

Yet I find when I run into certain people whom judged me harshly from an alienated distance and have advised others in how I should be dealt with, my first reaction is a physical rigidity. I must then work through conscious efforts of my own to release my reactionary judgment of them. It is very hard to remain open and not to protect and respond with reciprocal pecking order judgments of my own.

It is burdensome to judge others, far more so than it is to be judged. I shall try to carry the light load of others judgment on my soul while I set down the bone crushing burdening of judging them in return.

even the light load of judgment tends to be bone crushing when one is on bended knee.