invisible imaginary neck dart protection
plus funny with each load

i haul up from houston, my trailer and truck bed piled high, as early in the morning i arrive in the ville to teach, i end up unstrapping my art supplies from my trailer and handing them to students for their own projects–a few doors, a handful of windows, a couple of ladders, some hoses, chains, and various other misc hardware. they marvel at my magnificent aged patina-d treasures that i have harvested from  houston’s urban waste stream. they aspire to my capacities at dumpster diving and big trash day scavenging. even funnier to me is when i just happen to have a needed strange tool being toted in the back of my truck right when a student requires just that. makes me smile but also i tend to feel like the insane professor who just happens to have doors, windows, rubber, tar, ropes, hoses, ladders, chains and power tools along with her when she comes to class.

speaking of insane, this afternoon i carved and sanded a neck protector from a cheap plastic plant planter. this protector i shall wear tomorrow when i give my contemp art lecture to protect me from the invisible darts i am expecting to have shot at me by ashton, chelsey, kimmy, edwin, luke, perhaps even jeromy and surely others. i am afraid i may get neck darted simultaneously by them all. so at the onset of lecture i plan to place my cheap plastic plant planter invisible imaginary neck dart protector upon my throat–ha!–they will surely not be expecting this! perhaps i will share a picture at a later date. i really don’t want to get imaginarably neck darted because then i must fall flailing flat to the floor until someone dares to pull the imaginary darts from the professor’s neck–AWKWARD!! if i were a student, i would leave the darts there, abandon class on what i expect to be the most magnificent day of the spring so far. thus i shall be prepared with my neck protector! SHAZAM!


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